An Open Letter to Me.

Oh Anya. You have grown more than you know. These past 13 years have been hell fighting for what you believe in, fighting for what you know you’re called to do. Every single step of the way, you have been met with new challenges, severe challenges. It’s been hard for you to refrain from comparing your life to those who seem to have it much easier. It’s been hard for you to trust God and understand why He places you in such dire circumstances so others can learn from your mistakes and avoid things that have caused you detours and pain. It’s been hard to, for the first time, acknowledge your anger toward God and your resentment toward His purpose for your life. I know it’s been hard…but look at you surviving anyway. Look at you thriving anyway! Look at you having joy and maintaining your peace…anyway! Today and everyday, I celebrate you. I celebrate your strength and I celebrate your ability to persevere with grace and so much style! You have accomplished so much. No, really you have. 3 degrees, 2 publications, more than ½ way done with med school, multiple research presentations, started a blog, and so much more all before 30?? C’mon son! Remind yourself of your accomplishments too. Dwell on those successes and take them all in. You’ve also improved with practicing restraint with your words—minus that Resident you told off last month…she deserved it though! And you’re becoming more aware of your facial expressions so you can modify those too. Truly you’re growing because girl, you used to not care. Anyone who disrespected you could get it! Rarely the antagonist but never afraid to get👏🏾someone 👏🏾together! But now, you really do try to respond the way Christ would respond. Sheesh! Growth.

You are your greatest love, but also your worst critic. Stop that. Know more is coming and everything will work out at the perfect time(s). Another Valentine’s Day…as for him(s), you know that’s not what you prayed for. You know that’s not what your Grandmother and Great Grandmother prayed for. As the world continues to mock you for your standards and qualifies you as way too hard to please, just know you are doing the right thing. You are on the right path. And ‘easy?’ Well, honey, that’s just not something you’re able to be. Continue to do what is healthy and not just what feels good. Remember what Ms. Kisha says: “Excuses are tools.” The right one will have solutions and consistency, not excuses for foolery.

You’re going places. Period. Amazing places. Even when it doesn’t look like it, even when you’re down and out. Continue to be a light. I’m so freakin proud of you! You are loved by so many, but most importantly, you are loved by self. And that, my dear, is one of your greatest accomplishments of all—genuine self-love AND self-respect (you don’t play!) I can’t wait to see what’s in store for you. This is your year. So get ready for God to “restore the years the locusts have eaten: (Joel 2:25) Yes, all 13 of ‘em! And get ready for that girls’ trip with your cousins in Europe! On and poppin does not even describe the dopeness that’s going to transpire. Keep tackling each step day by day and watch as allll your dreams come to pass. I can’t wait to see.

Love you,