My 30s Have Been Life-Changing.

Life-changing indeed. IT’S MY BIRTHDAY, Y’ALL!!! As I reflect on yet another blessed year the Lord has given me, I can’t help but think about all the pivotal moments that have led me to right where I am today. So many say you’re 20s are for growing pains and your 30s are truly when you step into your own. Well baby, I’ve been stepping, sliding, (sometimes) slipping, and gallivanting into my own for the past 3 years. Each step of the way has been beyond favored. This journey has been sacred.

PIVOT. My 20s introduced the skill and my 30s perfected it. I have had to pivot so many times in my adulthood I’m starting to lose count. Failing STEP 1, almost not becoming a doctor, not matching right away, moving to Martha’s Vineyard for a gap year job, not matching into OB/GYN, moving to New York for residency, and so much more. I did not plan not a one of those things. And yet, with each step of my journey I (try to) embrace the unplanned and welcome the unknown. I (again, try to) dive head first into what God has for me, trusting He knows best. I freak out less and less with each time major life plans don’t go my way. I’m able to deal with life. My Dad used to always tell me growing up that life is unfair and you have to learn to “deal.” I used to think those words were so cliché, but he was absolutely right. Being able to deal and press forward no matter what separates those who want to from those who do. There is something to be said about taking everything that goes wrong and turning it into the accomplishment of your goals anyway. Being able to pivot is a life skill I never knew I needed, but am so glad I have; a skill I was 100% FORCED into developing. But Now!!! You can swing a curve ball at me and I’m knocking it out the park. I can problem-solve. I can get creative. I can get resourceful. I can get resources. I can be the resource. Because I learned to pivot, nothing can stop me from achieving my ultimate goals. Oh we gon’ get there. It’s just a matter of how and when.

PEACE & JOY. When I tell you my 30s truly solidified how much I value these gifts from God!! When I started dating my last boyfriend, one of the first things I explained to him was how much I value my peace and joy. I told him if he cost me either, he was too expensive. And…well…y’all see I’m not married. I have cultivated a life and a home that includes peace and joy. Someone once visited my home and said, “I can tell God lives here.” Others have come to my small, modest apartment even in New York City and took their time hanging out/visiting; saying they were just so comfortable. It was during the pandemic that I realized how much I enjoy the spaces I create and the peace and joy therein. I was in Atlanta for a good part of the panini and those streets were wild! Still poppin! I spent even more time at home by myself and was happy as a clam. I realized what a gift I have. Because I’m comfortable with self and the environment I create, I did not have to nor did I want to risk my life just so I didn’t have to be alone. I value that. I value me. I value my space. And when someone can reinforce the peace and joy I created…well, that’s when my space will open up to someone else. But ya girl is not in a rush. My 30s have taught me that:

PATIENCE PAYS. I once saw a meme that said, “Lord, please bless me with patience. Not life experiences that will teach me patience, but the actual patience.” Y’all, I hollered!! If that ain’t me!! Again, the lessons indeed came starting in my 20s. I finally got it in my 30s. Patience pays. I’ve seen so many rush into things I used to think I wanted. Those things blew up. Here I am safe and sound because I did not rush my life away. Every time I acquiesce to God’s timeline, He pays me for it. He’s not in a rush, and I’m truly learning not to be either. I’m not perfect at it, but much much better. I know He’ll give me all the desires of my heart. He certainly has a good track record with me. He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? ~ Romans 8:32

POSSESS CONFIDENCE. I’ve always had self-confidence and, for the most part, have been self-reassured. But there is something about my 30s that make me care even less what people think about me. If you like me, amazing! Chances are I like you back. If you don’t…well…I didn’t ask you lol. But really, my parents will tell you I’ve always been vocal about what I want and think. In my 30s, that quality has been on fire. I speak my mind. I say what I mean and I mean what I say. There have been certain parts of my confidence that have under attack through the years. Still I rise. One I’m willing to share on my public platform: I’ve always been self-conscious about wearing swimsuits. I grew up in a predominately white neighborhood where most girls’ shapes were straight and narrow. Let’s just say my hips don’t lie. Never did. Just this week, I posted a photo of myself in an Andrea Iyamah swimsuit to my IG stories. 20 something year old Anya would have never done that. 30 (something) year old Anya, though? Oh, she’s lit.

I am living. I am thriving. I am growing. I am stepping into my own as a physician. I have family and friends who genuinely care for me. I have a life full of purpose. I have dreams and I’m going for every single one. My 30s are where I accomplished my dream of becoming a physician, established boundaries to reinforce self-respect, grew my brand beyond my wildest imagination, and learned to trust the Lord. I look forward to all that’s now and that’s next. My 30s have changed my life, y’all. And that change is for the better.

xx,

Photos by Sweetie Mensah

Preset by Tina Smith