And Just Like That…

I’m in my third and final year of residency. Y’all!! Y’ALL!!! God is just so great. I can’t even tell it all. It seems like just yesterday I moved to NYC and started working overtime to make this experience work. Remember when y’all thought I was only going to be here for one year and I had to explain residency and how it works? Ha! That was definitely a laugh to keep from crying moment. And Now. I have made as much of a home for myself here as possible. I have made my apartment as warm (literally and figuratively) as possible. The wonderful owner of Harlem Cycle greets me by name. The amazing curator of Heath Art Gallery sees me walking on the sidewalk and asks me how I’m doing. I have established community here even outside of my residency program. I am a chameleon and I pride myself on being just that; on being able to adapt even in the toughest of situations and ride that thang out because I know the objective is purpose-driven and God-given.

I am here. I am a year away from being done with my medical education and training. This non-traditional med student turned doctor is 18 years in the making: undergrad, post-bac, 2 grad degrees, med school, gap year, residency. Just wow, God. I thank Him for sustaining me because I could have easily given right up. I’m so glad I stayed the course. While becoming and being a physician is one of the hardest things I have done/still do, the task has also been incredibly rewarding. When my prenatal patient double checks to ensure I’ll be in the delivery room with her, when the older gentleman in my neighborhood checks in with me and trusts me with questions about his health, when the new father hugs me in clinic and can’t wait to show me the baby, when the young woman I just met in clinic excitedly greets me when she sees me walking around her community…those moments matter so much to me. Being a physician is great privilege. You are with people—helping them, informing them in the most crucial of ways—in the best of times and in the worst of times. People trust me with their things, with their lives. I’m so grateful to serve in this way. I’m grateful to be accessible in this way. I want to be that community doctor my people recognize and trust. I’m getting inklings of that now. I have a vision for that now.

One incredibly wise resident who just graduated told me on more than one occasion, “Anya, focus on what you need here. Get the skills you want, graduate, and move on.” Her words reverberate in my mind every time I feel myself get distracted or down about the discomforts of my NYC experience. And y’all know there have been some discomforts. While I can’t wait to be nice and cozy again in ATL, I have to say I’m very proud of myself for not wallowing. I have, instead, taken my friend and colleague’s advice. I’ve done every single thing in my power to enhance my women’s health exposure and expertise. That effort continues this year. I’ve done every single thing in my power to grow my business and my brand. That effort continues this year. My time in NYC is coming to a close, but there is still work to do. And you know what? I am so grateful to do it.

I’ve made it through intern year.

I’ve made it through the judgement as a physician with a social media presence. People in my program definitely had preconceived notions about me simply based on the fact I have a brand on social media. Many assumed I would be loud, extroverted, and all the way out there. Not so. My extroverted tendencies are exclusive to my circle. There were a few very confused folks in my program (probably reading this right now! ha! heyyyyyyy!) who tried to contribute to and even control my narrative. I verbally smacked that notion down immediately and continued to do my thing.

I’ve made it through my NYC renting experience.  I’ve advocated for myself and my neighbors who have been in this building for decades. Collectively, we have fought for adequate heat, fair rent pricing, appropriate pest control, and proper sanitation. My neighbors stood up for themselves before I moved in, but let’s just say those 311 phone calls and HPD reports became a little more poppin (and more frequent) after they made my acquaintance. Ha!

I’ve made it through unfair and unmerited treatment. I didn’t transfer or take a leave of absence when some doubled down on their disdain and contempt toward me. I am especially proud of my resilience here because so many would have folded. So many would have packed it up and gone home. Instead, I kept my head down, kept studying for STEP 3, passed, and secured my exit plan. With the rate of physician death by suicide, let us all take more seriously how we treat resident physicians. I thank God I know Jesus and He has fortified me and my mental health through and through.

I made it through STEP 3.

And y’all know I made it through STEP 1.  I no longer regularly dwell on this exam and that alone is such miracle and such an immense move forward. This exam never quite defined my career the way people said it would. I pray the same for anyone having difficulty with any test. The test doesn’t define you. God does.

Y’all, I made it. I’ve fought and I’ve won. Now I am so ready to enjoy the spoils of my victory and take my time and my talents back home. I’m grateful for the mentorship and the amazing training (especially reproductive health!) I’ve received here. I’m so blessed by those who have supported and encouraged me. I’m so glad I get to put an NYC training hospital on my CV and that title alone comes with the universal understanding, “Oh, that training is tried and true. We should hire her.” Still, nothing hits like the feeling of being home, in your neighborhood, and in your element. I’m ready to have that feeling again.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: the powers that be in med school said I’d never do 4 things: pass my shelf exams (done!), graduate from medical school (done!), pass my STEP exams (done!), or match into residency (done!) All of these predictions were based off my difficulty with one exam. Now that I’m further removed from that experience, I can see just how silly, absurd, and unfounded their predictions were. I’m ready to put the finishing touches on that list of ‘nevers’ and complete yet another act of resistance by graduating residency and serving my community. I have 1 more year, y’all. As an inside joke with my class, I’ve been saying 1 more year since the program began. I said it as a mechanism to help me cope with how uncomfortable and out of place I felt. Now that time is finally here and I could not be more excited. As you all know, I’ll be leaving NYC and starting my new life a bit early come April 2024. In addition to practicing medicine, I will absolutely be diving into my interests outside the field. I have a few business ventures I’m excited about and I look forward to giving them more time. Y’all know I gotta stay multi-hyphenate. I’m going to keep living a big big life. I’m ready. I am so ready.

It’s morning, the sun is rising, and I’m status post another 12 hour night float shift. As I sit here typing this blog post, I reminisce on just how far I’ve come. Thank you, Lord. Final year. Let’s get it.

xx,

Photos by Sweetie Mensah